Should you strive for more?

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Dr Denise Taylor

15 October 2018

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An interesting conversation … should we strive for more?

I’m working with a couple of clients, recently moved to new jobs and both want to get ready for the next opportunity. They both have a great deal of energy and have a vision of where they want to be.
They have invested in coaching and I expect them to reach their goals.
But other times I talk to people and it becomes clear that the goal isn’t theirs.
Strive for more is something they think that they should do – it’s either society expectations, or keeping up with friends and colleagues.
I’m not sure that they will succeed.
There are other people who are happy. They’ve reached a point in life where they have enough money, not too much stress and are happy with their life. Are they the ones with the best life?

How happy are you right now?

When I ask clients this question most range from 3-5 if they are actively looking for a change of career, of around 7-8 if we are focused on promotion or a broader executive coaching area.  We cover a lot, and go into depth, in our sessions but part of this is around getting clarity on what it feels to be a 7 or 8.
We also look at what needs to change to get them up to a 9-10. Most times they don’t know.
But they want to know.
They feel they should be scoring 10/10 and for those who don’t understand maths are seeking 11/10!
What I know from 30+ years’ experience working with people is that whilst e.g. a promotion gives a short time rise in satisfaction numbers, over time it drops back.

Think about it – we get a new job and a significant raise, so we buy a better car, go on a better holiday, move to a bigger house. And then you get used to all of this and accept it.

So maybe this autumn it’s time to think about your life, your happiness and to ask yourself – is this enough? And it may be.
But if you are clear on something you want to do – to learn to be more assertive or be smarter at managing your time, or to have a happier relationship… perhaps that is the focus for you. Not striving for more but being happier where you are?
Would it help to talk about this? You can schedule a career/life conversation, here’s the link to the first step.

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